I spent the entire weekend just catching up on life.  Life with friends, life with family, life with school, and even life with myself.  Depression is like a ball and chain tethering you to the ground sometimes, but this weekend, it seems a lot lighter than usual.  Cassie is worried that J might have found her blog.  Honestly, I'm worried for her.
Food has been a bit of a challenge today.  I can't eat when I'm hungry like a normal person, I just have to eat constantly, which sucks.
Sometimes, when I look at myself in the mirror, I wish I saw a pretty girl.  I know, that's conceited and shallow, and I love life a lot more than to let beauty getting in the way of me living it, but it just hurts sometimes.  Also, I wish I wasn't so damn nervous.  About everything.  My friends, my school work, my job, my whole life.  And my anti-anxiety medication is fine, but it alters life, of which I'm not a fan.  So sometimes, I just feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.
But still, I am glad its gotten better lately...I think it's gotten a lot better.  I think everything has...

So, its not my best work

Today has been what appears to be the beginning of a 'So...its not my BEST work...' weekend.  Have you ever had a few of those tasks that you just feel you can't adequately complete, and it frustrates you deeply?  Well, for me, it appears that my 'So...its not me BEST work...' task might very well be Shakespearian poetry.  This is the first type of poetry I can ever remember writing in which my end result did not exactly instill a confidence in my writing skills for me.  Unfortunately, it seems that at the current moment, there is not much that can be done to rectify this.  Hopefully I'm going to be able to get over it using my favorite method, retail therapy starring Shayna, Cassie, and Madidi.  In addition, I have a history project and a value worksheet to finish.  This should be... an...interesting weekend, to say the least.

Lit & Comp Poem!

A free-verse poem I just finished writing for my Lit & Comp class. Enjoy!

Jealousy

Spark, who fathers Flame, 

Gorges on insecurity.

He spits rumors, lies, and gossip.

Poison smoke clouds the air.    

Ocean Quake, who births Tidal Wave,  

Is felt by no one else.  

But Water will never forget his hate.

Resentment tumbles into destruction. 

From little Seed, out grows Weed. 

Weed parents more seeds, 

And Weed spreads his vicious offspring, 

‘Til Love and friendship are engulfed.